Some(thing) about a dog

(Read bottum up.)

பெண்களுடைய அலறலும் குமுறலும் இல்லாமல் என்னய்யா thriller? ச்ச, இதைக்கூட புரிஞ்சுக்காம இருந்தா நானெல்லாம் படம் பாத்து என்ன புண்ணியம்?

29 Jul

..wait, it's a 'thriller' about women getting abducted in Madras? thoo! But it's true, you cannot make a thriller without victimizing women.

29 Jul

"A 90 mins thriller with no songs and background score," says Gautham Menon -- oh no, I may have to show some respect to this guy...

29 Jul

...and தொட்டி நாய்கள் (you know, from Reservoir Dogs) is still available for registration?

28 Jul

Gautam Menon's next film is titled 'Nadunisi Naaygal' (நடுநிசி நாய்கள்). I hope the story is not about the time he got bit by a bunch of...

28 Jul

ps. I might remove one of the tags later

The thing that I won't mention

The thing I won't mention is the thing there's been so much hysteria about; as it usually happens with the one that's present in the new thing. It's slightly louder when it's also made by the other one (like the last time it happened). There's no pressing need for me or anyone to dissect it in detail immediately. As I usually add, "it's not a film review." Perhaps, those with big 'reach' and influence should so that they can contain the business prospects of the new thing (with good reason). But an analysis doesn't have that urgency. It actually requires that the consumer (of the analysis) have consumed the new thing. So I'll wait. In fact, the new thing's saturation got me completely, subconsciously indifferent to it. And the hysteria has significantly subsided too.

To the troll: for what it's worth, I might end up talking about it regardless of what you say (just as you can't stop fantasizing about you and the one doing whatever regardless of what I say). Can't you at least wait until then?

Vetti Post - 13

a. Aishwarya Rai and Abhishek Bachan can't act.

b. Vikram hams it up.
c. The story is stale (is this the 'straight' version of Roja?)

d. Mani Ratnam's understanding of politics (or anything, for that matter) is superficial.

e. A.R. Rahman needs to update his software.

Of course, none of this matters when there are so many fan-boys in India and abroad. Too bad the film 'isn't ready' for this year's IIFA. But Ratnam doesn't have to worry. I'm sure Amitabh Bachan will find a better place, like Tel Aviv, for his next film's premiere.

Colonial Relics

A friend and I were talking about Jairam Ramesh’s remark on the convocation gown. His view was very similar to many who have commented in the TOI site. That it is a meaningless stunt given he wears suit, speaks English and does many things whose roots can be traced to the colonial ‘masters’. Nevertheless, as Jairam Ramesh added, it is a worthwhile debate for educational institutions if not the judiciary.

Clothing, whether forced or ‘chosen’, is a layer that symbolizes the docility rendered to a body that is otherwise (probably) ambivalent about its position in a power structure (Foucault). If there’s a normal way of dressing -- whose ‘normality’ is not static or unproblematic, of course -- and it’s at the centre of a continuum that extends both ways (of gender, morality, authority, sanity, conformity, social class etc.), there are clothes that fall on either side. Nevertheless, not all clothing is likely to lend itself to such binary classification. For example, is a man in his underwear expressing his masculine ‘freedom’ -- bearing his chest -- or just hanging on to his last piece of ‘dignity’? Space becomes an essential component to aide our judgment in such cases.

The ‘academic dress’ (or ‘convocation gown’) is not all that unique to convocations, after all. The judges and lawyers wear something similar (in some countries they still have the curly wigs to go with it). Add few pleats and the burqa is not far either. When it’s a convocation it segregates one from those who are not graduating, unifies those who are graduating, and above all, identifies them as lesser than those who take the podium seats. If you happen to be the unfortunate student of a ‘deemed university’ like Sathyabama, the insult won’t just stop with Jeppiar donning a ‘better’ dress than yours, Dr. Vijay might be there to rub it in deep.

The problem here is not necessarily that the gown is a ‘colonialist relic’ -- which it is -- but that it’s a symbol of servitude students all over the world are haunted by. It is actually apt that there be an honest send off: making obvious the power relationship between the students, teachers and the management. If there happens to be a debate and the universities want to do away with the ‘colonial gown’, I’d recommend a very ‘Indian’ loin cloth for the students and a well ornate sherwani with all the ‘zamindari’ gear, including a whip, for the officials.

PS. Ironic as it is, it’s commonplace to find ‘graduation photographs’ in almost every house that has a university graduate and a nail. I wonder if the ‘masters’ who award the degree -- you know, the likes of Dr. Vijay and Dr. Kamal Haasan -- have their ‘graduation’ photos in their living room. If they did, how is one to differentiate the ‘real’ and the ‘fake’?

On exclusion, elitism etc.

Since I've decided to delete comments (not moderate) regularly, I might as well make an explanatory post on it instead of stretching the discussion elsewhere. Since the exchange is pretty long, I'll just post them as comments -- as they appeared in the previous post.

Zoned Out (new series): Blue eyes

"Is that your mother in the photo?" said C2
-"yeah, she is."
C2 walked closer to photo hanging in the wall. "Oh my God, she looks so beautiful!"
"Thanks," said Mundi. C2's observation seemed to gratify him.
C2 called me and pointed to the photo.
I said, "Is that Mundi's mom? Cool"
-"isn't she pretty? I mean, look at those beautiful blue eyes!"
"meh…" and rolled my eyes as if to say "whatever!"
C2 was somewhat upset over my reaction, but she didn't say anything. I don't know if Mundi noticed either of us.
C2 and I are good friends and roommates. Mundi drove us to our building. C2 remained quite as we took the elevator and walked to our apartment; something's coming up for discussion.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” asked C2.
"What happened?"
-"didn't you think your reaction was completely uncalled for? Why did you have to be such an asshole to Mundi?"
"What the fuck are you talking about? It was your comment that was completely uncalled for!"
-"what was so wrong about saying Mundi's mother was beautiful?"
"Ok, let me break it down for you. You made a completely gratuitous aesthetic judgment and you expressed it out in the open too. She is Mundi's dead mother, how the hell does it matter to anyone that she was supposedly beautiful?"
-"not even to Mundi?" interrupted C2 quite angrily
"No wait, please let me finish. This is what you seem to assume: it's perfectly alright to say that someone is beautiful, especially if it's a dead person. You assume that those who are related to the said person will be pleased"
-"oh, you're such a genius for figuring that out. So much for 'deconstruction'"
"Wait, wait, I'm not done yet. While you may be right in your assumption, what you said is still problematic. First, let me get the cliché out of the way. She looked beautiful to you, why should others or I agree? Second: you are talking about Mundi's mother. Why should he be pleased that his mother was beautiful? Is he going to get any more closer to his dead mother because a member of his society thinks she is beautiful? I mean, if you really wanted to make him happy, you should have said his d…"
-"that is so sexist!"
"Well, you are his girl friend. He wouldn't mind that kind of appreciation. Being a 'manly man' as he is, he would have loved it for you to go public about his penis. If you think that ..."
-"will you cut down on the rambling and make your point?"
"What do you mean? I think I've made my point abundantly clear. You just lapped up the bullshit practice of saying that people are beautiful when it doesn't and shouldn't matter the least bit and I refused to participate in that charade. And what's with these ‘blue eyes’, long hair crap? Anyone can get a pair of cheap contacts and make their eyes look blue, purple or whatever"
-"but they are not natural!"
"Yeah, racially natural and naturally racist! When did we start caring about 'natural' shit anyway? Give me a minute...you see this cow? That's what natural means in 2009. Which era's 'natural' are you talking about?"

Disclaimer: All conversations and characters (including mine) in the Zoned Out series are and probably will be fictional. Characters may appear too self-righteous, intelligent, vevaram, one-dimensional etc., and their conversations exaggerated.

Slumdog Millionaire

This movie is so full of it. The teenage kids can't act, the stereotypes are beaten to death and the juxtapositions are ridiculous. Life in the slums could not have been exaggerated, romanticized and yet contradicted into a weird concoction worse than this movie has.

The only way to watch the movie is to not take it seriously (as Boyle does sporadically); even though it deals with communal riots, child abuse, gangsters, sexual violence, poverty, social prejudice etc. After all, it dares to break into a self-mocking song and dance in the end of it all. "Hey, they are just celebrating the spirit of the youth and the triumph of the underdog! Just chill, will ya?" Sure.

I wonder what people like Mira Nair (Salaam Bombay) and Dev Benegal (Split Wide Open) have to say about this clueless caricature that deals with topics that are too many even for a quiz-game show.

PS. I liked the background score, though.

vetti post - 12

Because this is my blog, I'll use it make an announcement that doesn't really mean anything to others but would give me the superficial satisfaction of being "honest."

I stopped eating meat little over five years ago. When I stopped, I had some ethical, philosophical reasons; three years later, after some reflection on certain things, I didn't really subscribe to those reasons but remained a non-meat eater anyway. (I did a podcast on this topic a year ago.)
For at least 2 years I was quasi-vegetarian for no particular reason. But in the last two months I happened to cook more meat dishes than usual, because I had/I was at more get-togethers than usual. So I tried a lot of new dishes and was "forced" to taste the food. Then tasting became eating when I was lazy and had nothing else to eat.

Basically, I want to say that I've been eating meat once in a while for the last two months. So I'm now a non-vegetarian. Having returned to this status, however, I'm not all too excited about it. Somehow non-vegetarian food has lost its appeal. I think I'll become a quasi-vegetarian again, soon.

Terminology

Either choose the "both are acceptable" stance and move along or choose the 'right', although often archaic, version.
So there's a desi moron that I know who's constantly trying to outsmart me. His latest was this: "Suresh, it's not a rooter, but a rowter". Well, no, you nitwit. Rowter is a tool used in carpentry, rooter is the computer device you and I are referring to. idha naan sollala, Oxford dictionary solludhu, so indhaa kallu, oru oramaa poi mandaya odhachukko!

PS. We are, of course, talking about router.

Commentary

IPL: Mumbai Indians vs. Kings XI Punjab

Greg Chappell: Pathan to Uthappa. Uthappa swings, the ball hits the helmet. (Uthappa removes the helmet to adjust it.) Looks like the helmet has left its imprint on Uthappa's head...oh it's actually his haircut.

WTF: Cyber Crime?

Twenty-two-year old Rahul Krishnakumar Vaid was arrested by the cyber crime cell of Pune police last Friday from Gurgaon in Haryana for posting vulgar content about Congress president Sonia Gandhi on social networking site Orkut.

Vaid had posted the content in an Orkut community titled 'I hate Sonia Gandhi'.

Source

Vetti post-10

Some right wing extremists used to comment that the US should bomb the Mecca on its most populous day and put an end to a big percentage of their foes. I know, it's the most barbaric thing to say. Only mindless drunk men can think of such things.

I don't drink or do drugs. But I still think the theatres screening Kuruvi should be hit with tomahawk missiles when they are 'houseful'.

PS. I cannot honestly say that my emotions will be different if either of them actually happened.

Vetti pride

Although I give rude replies to the comments that I get in my youtube 'channel' all the time, there are a few I don't 'approve' at all. To top it, I also send an annoying personal message to their inbox. And sometimes, I become so full of it that I post it someplace where I can look at it and go "cha, ennama think panraan?".

Comment:

the mere fact that u have uploaded a clip on a public domain, allows all of us, 2 say whatever we want. and like what u yourself have said "dont tell me, what 2 say or like".
so practise what you preach Mr MGR! bet u r not married! mm why should we b surprised!!

Reply:

About "freedom of expression":

Sure, it does allow us to say whatever we want. Only that I decide whether your nonsense will be posted in my channel. I'm not stopping your wimp-ass from uploading a video showing any part of you (or saying anything).

So there: your freedom of expression in my channel is under my control and I'm snipping it. Why? Because you are not worth it.
When you decide to make anything worthwhile in your channel and if I happen to comment on it, you may then want to reciprocate this arrogance. Until then, STFU. (And this is the last time I'm replying you.)

PS. This post may be a little contradictory to something that I might have said in the past, but what the hell?

ek gaun mein

Vetti Post - 9

It was the summer holidays of the year 1993 and I used to listen to a comedy gig by 'Moorthi-Gopi' in a cassette player. It had a lot of actors (i.e. impersonated voices) put together in interesting scenarios. There was a very funny line that I can never forget. Scenario: All the actors are gathered in TN assembly as elected representatives (on both ruling and opposition sides). The speaker starts the day with 'thamizh thaai vaazthu'. Chorus: paandiyanin raajiyathil uiyyalaala (because, Rajini is the ruling party leader) Kamal: idhuva thamizh thaai vazthu? (and sings angrily) oru vaai kozhupedutha...thamizachi paal kudichavan da! Goundamani: yow! appa naanga mattum enna vellakarichi paalaya kudichu valandhom? What reminded me of this? I was browsing through the headlines and found that the Mumbai's IPL team has been named 'Mumbai Indians'. appo mathavan ellam Nepal'kaarana?

 

 

Found this

WTF?

In the match between India and Australia yesterday, there happened a fielding accident/incident involving Michael Clarke and Tendulkar. Basically, Clarke ran into Sachin and ended up dragging him down in the collision. Here's what Ravi Shastri had to say about it when they were showing it in the replay: "Clarke was going for the ball and ended up having something bigger in his hands". Just as he was saying that with a rather 'straight-faced tone', Clarke was seriously grappling with Sachin's buttocks in slow-motion. This is why cricket is worth watching with commentary on.

Sabapathy

It's one of the funniest movies in Tamil. Even as a kid I laughed so hard when I first saw the movie, probably around 1990. I found the movie online and started watching it again. Among a lot of new surprises from my first time viewing, I picked up some ridiculously funny expressions. It's not just the comic timing, but the use of language, acting etc from a historical perspective. The movie is over half century old, you can see that a lot of things have changed since then. But some of the 'changes' catch you off guard. One of the parts that totally cracked me up was this (In case you don't have the time to watch it yourself):

There are two Sabapathys: the young 'master' and his slightly older servant. The servant is a bit of crackpot -- a bit more than the 'master'. Sabapathy and his mother visit the 'would be' bride's place with the servant accompanying them. They reach the place and as they get down from the car they hear someone dancing upstairs (bharathnatiyam it would seem). At this point the exchange goes:

Servant: amma, edho thevudiya kacheri nadakudhu
mother: edho vishesham pola irukku, nalla sagunam dhan

The word thevudiya--which is now more than derogatory and often bleeped--is used again, rather casually, in another scene that follows immediately. If you want to watch just this part, click on this link and slide it to 35 minutes. You can watch the entire movie from here.

Aside: The link between the word thevudiya and bharathnatiyam may be understood from this interesting post on the movie Arangetram.

Jodhaa Akbar

I tried to download the movie a day after its release and much to my annoyance it turned to be a fake torrent. Well, there was another movie in its place -- Super Star. I did, however, get the actual movie yesterday. After watching it, I so wished that the second download was a fake too.

The fact that this movie has been lauded as one of the greatest in recent times just shows the perversion in the mainstream consumption of mainstream art forms, especially movies[1]. It happened among Tamil cinema viewers in the last decade. When the dearth of 'good' movies and pseudo-critiques in TV created an illusion of differentiating the 'good' from the 'bad'. Of course, the need to put down the Other -- non-Tamil movies, especially Hindi -- effectively blurred the viewers possible 'objective' assessment of a movie further. Veyyil and Paruthi Veeran are lauded ubiquitously, almost (Paruthi Veeran is also "going places")[2].

I wonder if the same phenomenon has caught up with the Hindi movie viewers as well. The need to "have something on par with Hollywood". I'm not as surprised by a few "critics" on TV because they are known to be cronies of one faction or the other. After all, they need someone for their 'Grope a star' kind of shows. But the mainstream viewer's enthusiasm to suck up, in this context, is slightly disturbing. They are either gleefully buying into the false binaries created by the TV hosts (Hrithik can act, Sunil Shetty cannot. Aishwarya Rai looks like a feathered turkey, but she looks stunning etc.) or they are caught in some kind of self imposed binary. To choose between national pride, supposedly represented by this "great Indian movie", and being an American boot-licker.

The reason one likes this movie cannot probably oversimplified like above, but who cares? When one likes an oversimplication like Jodhaa Akbar, he/she better be prepared undergo the same treatment.

-----------------------------------
1. To quote from one of my previous posts: the perversion is not in the consumption per se, but how it's perceived. Ex: when a health expert appears on TV and starts explaining the benefits of consuming 500ml Pepsi everyday.
2. Read this interesting column by Sudhir Mishra

WTF(s)?

Dhoni is probably the worst batsman the Indian team has had in the last 5, 6 years. Whenever I talk about Sachin I say, "he brings in so much life and flavour to the game" at one point or the other. I think the opposite can be said about Dhoni. Everything becomes ugly and embarrassing. His unwieldy stroke-play, lack of technique -- ewww, this kind of cricket is probably fun to play; like in under-arm cricket at your 600x800 ft terrace, but it's so painful to watch. That's the way it has been since the day he stepped into the team (well, those days it was also his kuruvi koodu hair). But there was some hope that he'll be in and out, if not thrown out for good. No. What happened was the opposite -- he became the bloody captain. What's worse? Nobody in the media seemed to have a problem with that. Some even wanted him to be made the test captain. adhu seri.

A lot of people compare Afridi with Dhoni. There cannot be a bigger travesty. Afridi, as much as I hate him when he plays against India, is actually quite capable of playing decent cricket shots. This guy Dhoni, on the other hand, gives new meaning to the expressions "kaatan maadhiri", "kaatu adi" etc., (even that only when manages to send the ball to the boundary).

It's not so much his batting or the fact that he's been made the captain that irritates me, it's the unbelievable silence from the cricket commentators. Harsha came close to commenting on it, but chose to play it safe by asking Slater what the Australian cricketers thought about Dhoni's batting? The best that Slater could come up with was, "he's not the most orthodox player, but that's what is unique about him. The raw approach to the game." What?

Gavaskar to Shastri, none of them have a problem with the way he bats? Is this the big elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about? To top all this he has the nerve to assume self righteous authority when he talks. Who the hell said this moron is "humble"? "I could have a completed that run with my cramped leg"? Can you be a bigger asshole than this?

Disclaimer: some quotes may not be exact.